What will they think of next?

Unborn Baby Ornament - US Troop Model

Protect our troops - from the womb to the war. What if the fetus you were going to abort would grow up to be a soldier bringing democracy to a godless dictatorship?

Also available in brown.

This is not a "Fuck you world!!!" post.....

I will not blog about work because I could be fired (I can think of a million worse things than being fired right now).....but please see above.

Sawdust & Diamonds

I will swallow your sadness and eat your cold clay,
Just to lift your long face.



I could go on an on about how much I love Joanna Newsom. On and on about why I love Ys better than Milk Eyed Mender (which I still quite enjoy). On and on about what a thrill it was being 10 feet from her, watching her play her harp while simultaneously playing her unique voice, both with wicked fervor. I could, but I won't.

This song was playing in the car today as I drove home for lunch. While stopped at a light, I saw a honey bee hitch a ride on the top of a car and an older woman in a brand new Volvo * literally* rocking out to a classical piano piece. It was lovely.

Morning Phone Call

Actual Phone Conversation Had This Morning:

Hi honey, its your old Grammie.

Hi Gram.

Honey, if you had a choice of colors, would you rather have black and ivory or just plain ivory?

Uhhh.......? Well, I have a hell of a time keeping anything white clean....so black & ivory?

That's what I thought (a triumphant sound in her voice).....I am the same way!

Are you making something? Are you going to crochet me some more covered hangers?

I'm not making anything.......And if you were a size, would you say a small or a medium?

Gram, what is this for?

Christmas honey, Christmas presents. I want to do Christmas presents this year and so I am doing it. I am ordering you a sweater.

Oh......great........Medium. Usually I wear small shirts, but medium seems the safer bet these days.

A person never knows with sweaters....


When I was little, my Grandma would hand us the giant JC Penny Christmas catalog and have us go through and circle things that we like. She lives in the country on a cattle ranch 30 miles from the nearest town, so ordering things from a catalog is her main mode of shopping. I immediately pulled up JC Penny's website to look for sweaters that come in black and ivory, but found nothing.....maybe I should check Cabela's and Intermountain Ranch Wear too.....



No matter where it comes from, or what it looks like(even if it looks like a clown face...and yes, that is Will Wheaton), I vow to love it because it was picked with love by my Grammie. She has taught me many wonderful lessons in life. She is giving and kind and has the biggest heart of anyone I know.

She also taught me the following:

1. If you get your stomach wet while washing dishes, you will marry a drunk.
2. A tablespoon of vinegar a day will help get rid of your cold.
3. Brazil nuts (aka nigger toes) are good for your sinuses.
4. Salt over the shoulder for luck.
5. Going to bed with wet hair will give you arthritis.
6. A nursing woman should drink beer to increase the quality of her breast milk.
7. And while on the topic of breasts, regarding the size, Grammie always says that more than a mouth full is a waste.

I love my Gram.

Once Upon a Birthday

Yesterday I officially turned 31.

For the second birthday in a row, I woke up next to this guy. I think that I will make that my new birthday ritual.
















He gave me a very frivolous, wonderful present.














I named her "Babeez", as I name all inanimate objects that I love some flavor of "Baby" (1986 Baby Blue Saab 900 = Baby, 2007 7 speed Jamis Commuter = Baby II, Brown and Lime Green Zune = Babeez).

Here she is next to the coat that I knit her














My son (with the help of my mother) got me a giant sewing machine bag filled with new yarn, a pattern book, all manner of new needles, and other accoutrement. I love it!




















Randi and Jacob took us out to dinner last night and I was gifted with some beautiful hand spun yarn and another Jacob Degering original for my collection. So awesome! I am going to knit the mat for the picture then we're going to frame it. He said that I could pretend that the girl in the painting was a hot stenciled version of me.














I think that I will use this new journal as my knitting journal....




















I know that I'm only 1 year into my 30's, but I have to say, they aren't half bad. I feel more confident, more secure, fitter, happier, more productive.....comfortable. If I could ask anything of my 31st year, it would be; Let's take 30, replicate all the good, learn from all the bad, and lose 10-15 pounds you fat fuck! That would be perfection.

My Son The Art Critic

On children and art.

This weekend the mister and I took the boy to the Andy Warhol exhibit that is currently showing on campus. The boy was overjoyed to be visiting his “first real art museum!!!”.

In school they learn about a new artist or form of art every month or so. One month it was Picasso and abstracts, which led to him obsessively drawing abstracts of his face for a few days. Then was Van Gogh, which caused more concern about self mutilation than sunflowers or starry nights.

I guess lately they have been studying realism, and he is really into it. Sooo into it that he got pissed at us when we didn’t know “the first artist to ever paint apples……on a table…..with a white table cloth…”. Like, how could we be so dumb....(though I am still on the top of his list if he ever needs to make a mobile shout out on Cash Cab).

We get to the exhibit and his favorite Warhol pieces are two of General Mao.

This one because “you can’t really see his nose”.

And this one because “It looks like blood…”.

All in all, he was mostly unimpressed by Warhol. He couldn’t understand why someone would paint pictures of soup cans.

Also, he was distracted by glimpses at other nearby exhibits with paintings that looked more "real". When we were done with Warhol, we went to check these out. He was very impressed with these paintings and would inspect the eyes of each portrait to see how real they looked and when we would move to another painting, he kept looking back over his shoulder to see if the eyes were following us.

The more I talk with him about art and what he likes, and why, I see that he looks at Warhol like someone who is drawing stick figures, and I get it. If I were 7 again and learning to draw and make art, I would probably look upon still life with more awe and respect than I would a giant can of soup.

Urban Lounge 11-10-08

Top, coat rack
Bottom, urinal

No. No, I will not shut the fuck up.

You can pick up this lovely garment along with other female reproduction clad garb at: HERE

I don't need you but I want you.

LIMITED EDITION 7 CD ALBUM BOX SET - 10 DEC

Deluxe box set includes all seven classic Radiohead albums released on Parlophone from 1993-2003 (including one live album), repackaged in digipack sleeves featuring the original artwork.

Package includes:

Pablo Honey (1993)
The Bends (1995)
OK Computer (1997)
Kid A (2000)
Amnesiac (2001)
I Might Be Wrong: Live Recordings(2001)
Hail To The Thief (2003)

£39.99

The List II

If any of you happens to have a 1977 JC Penny catalog around, I would be interested in any of the following matching outfits for me & "the mister".



Hot.......



Hotter.......



Is it getting hot in here, or is it just us?




Our dream of matching swim wear could be a reality. Those swim trunks = laid.

And last but not least.......


Saturday mornings have never felt so good!

For more thrilling 1977 JC Penny fashion, visit: http://15minutelunch.blogspot.com/2007/10/strap-in-shut-up-and-hold-on-were-going.html